Finding out…

Once we had conceived & now looking back I guess I felt exhausted, drained, & very  hormonal.  At the time, I thought this was just because I had so much going on that month & maybe my period was finally coming back.  On Friday 7th June (just over 4 weeks pregnant) it hit me, I had 3 back to back meetings & I didn’t feel myself at all. I had a matcha latte at 4pm to try & give me a caffeine hit to be able to keep my eyes open for the rest of the day.  Before I left central London I met my friend Danielle to film one of her Danielle Peazer Method workouts.  Not only did I feel drained, my boobs were exploding out of my sports bra, I was wayyyyy more bloated than normal & we ended up having to cut it short because I didn’t feel right.  I then headed to Boots to buy a pregnancy test still thinking it was impossible to be pregnant seeing as I hadn’t had a period for 9 months.

The next morning I woke up first thing to take the test… 3 minutes later the little white stick flashed positive.  It felt like I was staring at it for hours, but a few minutes later I thought I should wake Adam.  I said can he sit on the sofa in the sitting room with Colin while I did the test & took myself back into the bathroom to figure out how to tell him.  I was in such shock I didn’t really know what I was doing.  I then walked back out with the test saying nothing & he just knew.  It was one of the best feelings in the entire word & my eyes are filling up with tears just typing this.  It did feel like a miracle & I couldn’t of felt happier.

I had a day planned with my friend Tiff so I then went off to meet her & carried on my day like normal / in complete shock (she still says to this day she had no idea).  We had to then go to planet organic to sort something out for Co Fro so on the way back we stopped to get a pregnancy test that showed your weeks.  The posh, expensive ones that I hadn’t brought before… I still couldn’t believe it (in total I think I took 6)! 

The test show 0-1 week, 1-2, 2-3 & 3+ weeks, so when it displayed 3+, we had no idea (because of no period) how many weeks I was past 3! That Monday we went to the doctors, not sure what we were expecting but it was very straightforward, getting refereed to the hospital & that was that… 

A friend recommended getting a private scan before then which you can get from 6 weeks so we worked out that if I was 3+ we knew at a minimum it would be ok to book one in for 3 weeks time.  

Honestly this was the best money we have ever spent & 3 weeks (which felt like 3 years) later it made the whole pregnancy feel real.  The moment of seeing the baby albeit so small & hearing the super fast (that’s normal) heart beat had us both in tears. 

And that was that, the first trimester was an absolute breeze…. or NOT ?

So now having the pregnancy confirmed I had a healthy little baby inside of me, my sensible head kicked in, reminding myself it’s still early days vs I’m having a baby = joy mixed with anxiety hit.

I though the moment we left the scan, ‘everything was about to change’ (well I guess it already had).  My body, what I ate, drank, did, exercised all changed & in all honesty I don’t think anything can prepare you for that.  

The hardest parts for me had to be the overall change in my routine.  Not jumping out of bed in the mornings or being able to work late on my laptop.  Early morning boxing classes were now mornings struggling to even get out of bed. Swapping fish & lots of veggies for bland, beige foods. I never liked salt before, now I wanted to grind it on everything. Pre pregnancy, I had a sweet tooth but now after having chocolate or anything super sweet I got a horrible migraine/ headache so that put an end to my Ombar a day!

My best advice for dealing with first trimester anxiety. 

* Worrying doesn’t help anyone or anything, your body will do what it’s meant to do. 

* A positive mindset: let your body & the universe do it’s thing. Learn how to navigate negativity, you do not need this in your life (not just when you’re pregnant, NEVER)

* What makes you feel relaxed & calm the most? Relax, close your eyes, listen to calming music or headspace meditation.

* Your body is changing but you still deserve to feel great, it sounds silly but a relaxing bath/ shower, hair wash, moisturise, blow dry, new comfy jumper or massage.  

* Treat yourself & look after yourself as best as you can.  What women’s body’s do & the things we go through is incredible, please realise how amazing you are. 

* Slow down, be “selfish” & always put yourself & your baby first. 

A few other first trimester tips.

* Try and swap your caffeine drinks for herbal teas, if you go to Holland & Barrett they have soooo many delicious flavours & Twining’s do a delicious digestion tea with Apple in which I became addicted too.

* They say eat little & often, personally I found eating full meals helped me from sickness as I liked feeling full of fuel, I didn’t ever feel it get hungry which I think is really important.  But we are all so different so workout what is best for you.

* Have a supportive network (family, friends, midwife, partner, I have found Instagram has an amazing community & we really are all in the same boat).  Also a few close friends who know you so well & you may wish to tell.  Or if not who you choose to share your news with, be honest how you feel, they will be their for you no matter what.  

* Don’t stress about letting people down or FOMO, because as time goes in you do feel a little self absorbed, selfish & boring, but I went to a few social event & felt so overwhelmed, nauseous & not the best company so became more careful who and what plans I made.  You are totally allowed to cancel plans, stay in, eat pizza & not move.   Their is no right or wrong just do what works for you and your body.


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